Chapter Sixty-One: Memories Like Smoke

Dawn was approaching, yet the two entwined bodies remained inseparable, pressed close together, their endless longing through the night seemingly unable to exhaust their boundless passion and vitality. Resting in Kong Ning’s broad, warm embrace, Lu Jing felt utterly content and happy. She knew well that what Kong Ning offered her was not only affection, tenderness, and respect, but also that intoxicating, unforgettable meaning of life that consumed her heart and soul.

Her hand drifted from Kong Ning’s chest to his face, finally cupping his cheeks as she spoke softly, “Little Ning, would you like to hear about my past?”

Kong Ning’s hand gently rested on her soft hip, guiding her lovely face before his eyes. “I do, but if it’s as painful as reopening an old wound, I’d rather not make you relive it.”

Lu Jing smiled sweetly, kissed the tip of his nose, and sighed. “It’s been seven years, I’m much better now, though my heart still aches whenever I remember. Little Ning, did you think the child in the photograph was cute?”

“Very cute! I could see your likeness in that little one’s face.” Kong Ning shifted slightly, ready to listen.

Lu Jing pulled his arm beneath her head and traced gentle circles on his chest with a finger. “That was the spring of ’87. My mother passed away from exhaustion. The only reason I could go to school was because of her tireless support. At the time, I was still frantically working on my graduation thesis. I rushed home from Chengdu, but I never got to see her one last time. It’s the regret of my life. My father died when I was five, and my sister and I were raised by our mother and a relative. Sigh—”

Kong Ning stroked her hair and nodded. “Uncle Wang has mentioned this part to me before.”

Lu Jing looked at him in surprise, then realized that after so many months of sharing meals and life together, it was only natural. “That relative is Uncle Wang. Without him, my sister and I wouldn’t be who we are today. Though my mother, restrained by village gossip, never married him, in our hearts he was always our father. For the past two years, I wanted to buy him an apartment in the city, but he refused. I asked him to retire in our hometown, but he said he wouldn’t go back until both my sister and I had settled down, or else he would feel he’d failed my mother’s dying wish.”

Kong Ning was deeply moved. Uncle Wang had never told him this. Thinking of Uncle Wang’s prematurely aged face, Kong Ning couldn’t help but sigh.

Lu Jing continued, “After graduation, I was assigned to an arts and crafts company in Lei River, responsible for designing bamboo and wood products for export. I hadn’t recovered from the loss of my mother, and my sister was still in school, so I threw myself into work to pass the time. I had a boyfriend in college, also from Lei River—a talented oil painter. He wanted to be posted in Chengdu but didn’t get his wish. After being assigned to the Lei River Education Bureau, he was very disappointed. I often comforted him and took him out for walks. But near the Lunar New Year, he left me a letter and disappeared. I cried and cried, heartbroken, and rushed to Chengdu to find him. At a classmate’s place, I found a wedding invitation he had given her. I collapsed and fainted on the spot. My friend rushed me to the hospital, and after two IV drips, I returned to Lei River. After the New Year, I resigned and went to Shenzhen. I just couldn’t stay in Lei River anymore. I was afraid I’d be destroyed by grief if I remained.”

Kong Ning got up, fetched a glass of water from the nightstand, watched her drink, then set it aside and pulled Lu Jing tightly into his arms as they lay down again. “Shenzhen was bustling back then, and there were plenty of opportunities.”

Lu Jing recalled those days with a faint smile. “Yes, when I first arrived in Shenzhen, I felt completely lost. I finally found a job at an ad agency run by a Beijing native, but after six months, the company went under. Then I went to the job market again and, a week later, landed a position at a Singaporean-run interior design firm. I thought it was a small company, but when I reported for work, I discovered that the forty-odd person firm was just a branch—its parent company, Jiahua Realty, was very famous, with seven subsidiaries like ours. That’s when I shifted to interior design.”

Kong Ning playfully tapped her nose. “No wonder you’ve made this little place so cozy. You’ve always been ahead of the trend—remarkable!”

Lu Jing snuggled into his arms, entwining her fingers with his. “After working there for over half a year, one of my designs won first prize in the real estate industry’s annual design competition. The next day, a beautiful bouquet was delivered to my office, but no one knew who sent it. Both our managers were women; they denied knowing anything. The flowers kept coming every day for a month. Finally, I couldn’t stand it and started searching for the sender. The next morning, before work, I followed the address on the card to a flower shop and saw him there—personally choosing the flowers. It was the chairman of the parent company, Xia Jiahua. I was stunned. I could hardly imagine that a man worth hundreds of millions would pick flowers himself, one by one, in a tiny shop.”

Sensing Kong Ning’s chest tighten, Lu Jing paused and glanced at him. Kong Ning closed his eyes and kissed her. “I’m jealous!”

Lu Jing pressed herself close and kissed him hard. “You rascal. Where were you back then?”

“Go on,” Kong Ning smiled, opening his eyes.

Lu Jing nodded. “Xia Jiahua was Singaporean, but his ancestral home was Wuxi. He was only twenty-eight, the idol of hundreds of girls in the company. He wasn’t as tall or as handsome as you, but he was honest, steady, scholarly, and generous—qualities I only discovered after getting to know him. I stood nearby, not knowing what to do. He was surprised to see me, but smiled and invited me to pick flowers with him. Dazed, I followed him outside before regaining my senses. I quickly chose two flowers and said goodbye. He didn’t mind, just smiled and bid me farewell. Half an hour later, he walked into our office with flowers in hand and, in front of everyone, placed them in mine. From that day on, we grew closer.”

“It was only later I learned that he was the only son in his family. Though he had many cousins, he was the main heir. A year later, we married. He hid our marriage from his family and registered at the foreign affairs office, telling me not to worry—once we were married, his family wouldn’t be able to object in time. He was right.”

Lu Jing sighed. “Six months later, I was pregnant. Jiahua happily told his parents, who flew from Singapore to Hong Kong and then to Shenzhen, furious. When they met me, they were cold, though not openly hostile. Jiahua patiently tried to persuade them. Two days later, his parents spoke to me privately and finally accepted the marriage. They asked me to move to Singapore after the child was born, and I agreed.”

At this, Lu Jing’s tears began to flow. “Who could have known… seven months later, Jiahua drowned at the beach with colleagues. He was gone, and nothing could bring him back. Within two days, dozens of relatives arrived, and after the funeral, they immediately began fighting over the inheritance. His parents, enraged, blamed his death on me, even calling me a curse… If not for the fact that I was carrying his child, I’m sure they would have thrown me out onto the street…”

Kong Ning wiped her tears and held her tightly. After Lu Jing’s sobs subsided, she continued, “I was so stricken with grief that I went into premature labor. The baby was born just under nine months, but thankfully healthy. Having the child gave me something to live for. I promised myself I would raise Jiahua’s child well, so he could grow up to be just as honest, kind, and learned as his father. But before he was even six months old, before he was weaned, his family forcibly took him from me…”

At the memory, Lu Jing broke down, crying uncontrollably. Kong Ning did his best to comfort her, sighing repeatedly, knowing all too well what a child means to a mother and the agony of such a forced separation. His heart ached for Lu Jing, his care for her deepening further.

Under Kong Ning’s gentle comfort, Lu Jing finally calmed. “After that, they secretly sent my child to Singapore. I went everywhere for help—the women’s federation, the courts—but no one could do anything. Every time, all I got was ‘there’s nothing we can do.’ I finally realized how much power the Xia family had in Shenzhen, and I knew I might never see my child again. I fell into a terrible depression that lasted over two years. I wasted away to just thirty kilograms, living in the hospital, with no friends or family around, not daring to let anyone at home know. Fortunately, the Xia family had some conscience and paid for all my medical expenses. After I recovered, they gave me the interior design company I’d worked for. I managed it quietly for several years until, at the end of the year before last, Uncle Wang was hospitalized with a serious illness and my sister, unable to find a job after graduating, needed my help. So I sold the company and came back. These ten years have weighed heavily on my heart, a burden I dared not share with anyone. Telling you today… I feel so much lighter, sigh…”

Kong Ning thought for a moment and tried to comfort her. “Don’t be too sad, Sister Jing. I’m sure your lovely son will come looking for his mother when he grows up. Nothing can break the bond between mother and child.”

Lu Jing shook her head and wept again. “No, you don’t understand how the Xia family operates, Ning. I know they’ll never let my son know his mother’s name is Lu Jing…”

Kong Ning hurried to reassure her. “Don’t lose hope! I believe you and your son will be reunited someday. Trust me!”

“I can’t believe it!” Lu Jing sobbed, climbing onto Kong Ning’s chest. “Little Ning, these past months, you’ve helped me rediscover the meaning and joy of living, the reason to go on. But… but after finally meeting someone who truly loves me, what if you leave me too? What will I do?”

Kong Ning’s heart twisted with pain. He had no words to soothe her wounded soul, so he could only hold her tighter with a deep sigh.

Through her choked sobs, Lu Jing pleaded, “Little Ning, let’s have a child together! I want to have a child…”