Chapter 21

Megan is not a stupid child. Even with only a flickering consciousness, she has learned many words; she simply finds it difficult to connect them with real-world objects.

Her perception progresses slowly. She pays more attention to inanimate entities and the minute phenomena that few people notice—she likes watching shadows, watching dust motes floating in the light, and watching water flow. She is a child capable of being at peace within her own small world.

Yet, she pays no attention to people.

No one knows Megan’s past. Even after being adopted by the Joker and given the name Megan Chris Damon, her true origins remain a mystery. From the very beginning, she has displayed her condition without reservation—

Her body and mind are ill. She suffers from malnutrition and developmental delays; her short, curly black hair is coarse, and her spirit remains trapped in a void. She has never truly awakened, never truly arrived; she only responds to death. Although she has improved significantly under the Joker’s "tutelage," those problems cannot be solved overnight.

As for what kind of family this child came from, how she was treated, or whether she was born this way or suffered a major trauma later—these are questions no one knows the answer to.

...

Returning to the present, Killer Croc’s hobbies are in stark contrast to his terrifying appearance. He enjoys reading. Having already tidied up the library yesterday, the tables and chairs were ready to use. He sits on the same side of the table as Megan, placing the children’s picture book in front of her.

Megan flips through the book herself. It is filled with beautifully printed color illustrations, with text serving merely as a garnish on the side, using innocent and cute descriptions to introduce the story. She can already understand and grasp some simple tales.

She bows her head to read, her short, curly black hair falling near her collarbone. A slight breeze drifts through the room, catching her fine, soft hair and making her look fluffy and soft. Megan does not speak; she breathes habitually through her nose, the sound so faint that people often overlook her presence.

But Killer Croc keeps his eyes on her. The young child does not know the proper way to sit, and when her spine slumps, Killer Croc uses his sharp claws to hook her collar and pull her upright. After repeating this once or twice, she understands the meaning. She touches her own cheek, then touches Killer Croc’s terrifying, monstrous arm, signaling that she understands.

Yes, even though Megan is learning language and words and slowly becoming like a normal child, she still refuses to speak.

Killer Croc once wanted to ask Megan about this, but deep within her eyes, there remains a sense of hardship and ignorance. Those bright, emerald-colored eyes reflect the outside world, capturing many images, but beyond that, there is no further meaning—it only proves that she has yet to possess a clear sense of self.

Perceiving the outside world is a slow and difficult process for her. Reaching her current state is already a miracle, and if she is lucky enough to have a long future, she should not be pressured too much.

In the end, neither he, Poison Ivy, the Riddler, Two-Face, nor the Penguin—who occasionally looks after her—have ever questioned or forced the issue of the child’s silence. After all, this Arkham Asylum is full of lunatics with all sorts of mental illnesses; one more little girl makes no difference. Even if she has some minor issues, they find her harmless and cute.

Does the Joker know about her problem? Does he know about her resistance to speaking?

—Ha! Of course he does!

He knows it all too well. He understands Megan better than anyone else here. This timid little mouse has clearly begun to perceive things and provide responses, yet even now, she hides herself away. She does not dare to show her face, trembling in a corner, exactly the same as she was at the beginning—not changed in the slightest.

This is truly disappointing and discouraging for the Joker, but he is a patient man. He will continue to maintain his entertainment, watching her seem to become more vivid day by day. Yet only he knows her true side: she is still refusing, and if there is the slightest disturbance from the outside, she might just wither away—

When people or animals are in extreme terror, they choose self-destruction.

Megan, this foolish child, is very slow to determine whether her environment is safe. Even while playing with a monster like Killer Croc, she does not realize the danger. Once startled, she will only follow her instincts: she wants to die; she wants to escape.

In short, this is a long process. Megan is a joy that will not turn sweet until the very end, and the Joker is still looking forward to it! He is even less likely to be the one to destroy or hinder her growth.

And so, under their "care," Megan has a relatively comfortable environment to live, study, and play. No one puts pressure on her, letting her grow up well here.

Megan’s studies are handled entirely by Killer Croc. Currently, he is teaching her to recognize common vocabulary; she might understand some spoken words but not know their spelling, and besides that, he is teaching her to write.

While she reads the picture book, Killer Croc writes down the learning goals for the day. After she has read five or six pages, he flicks his tail and stands up, lifting Megan along with him. "Reading for too long is bad for your eyes, let's take a break," he says, taking her to a patch of greenery outside the library’s side door.

Killer Croc doesn't carry Megan the whole time. Although she doesn't know how to refuse, he knows children need to move around. So, he walks slowly in front, and Megan follows his tail.

The massive Killer Croc’s footsteps are heavy. If he were outside Arkham or in the sewers, he would have ways to make his movements minimal, but here, he doesn't need to restrain himself. His breathing is also deep and muffled; even at rest, a large predator still carries a strong sense of threat.

They walk back and forth, satisfying Megan’s need for exercise while relieving her eye strain. She picks up a fallen leaf from the ground and holds it up, but without sunlight outdoors, there is no shadow. It takes her several minutes to confirm this, then she lowers her hand slightly to examine the leaf intently.

Even though Poison Ivy has introduced her to many plants, the ones in the conservatory are mostly rare species, while common trees and weeds are not found there because their vitality is so strong they grow everywhere.

Therefore, Megan does not recognize this particular leaf, but she doesn't need an answer; she holds it in her hand and studies it for a long time.

Her consciousness is limited; she can only focus on one thing at a time, so she stops and stands still.

Killer Croc turns back to look at her. The tiny child stands by the flowerbed, her gaze fixed intently on a common, fallen leaf. What joy or meaning could it hold? Are there stories hidden in the veins? Or are tiny people performing a play for her on its surface?

But he sees clearly that there is nothing on that leaf worth noting. Megan is simply looking at the leaf itself. It doesn't need to have any meaning; Megan is just "seeing" it. In the moment she picked it up, two lives born into this world met each other.

Even if this means nothing to others, they have met.

Megan looks at one side of the leaf for a long time, not caring much for the other side. She flips it over in her hand, then places it on the edge of the flowerbed. She tilts her head to look for Killer Croc, and upon seeing him, she chases after him, continuing to act as a little tail.

Killer Croc leans down slightly and reaches out his hand. Megan takes it, grasping one of his sharp claws, and they walk side by side.

His body has atavistically evolved into that of a crocodile, yet this feels more like an advancement, for his arms are not short like a crocodile's structure but rather muscular and thick, and even longer than normal human proportions. Even with his massive size, he only needs to hunch his back slightly to lead Megan along.

Back in the library, Killer Croc hands her the notebook with the simple words and sentences she needs to practice writing today. Megan takes it, pulls a pen from her pocket, removes the cap, and begins to copy.

Megan is an obedient student. She never gets distracted while doing her "homework," putting her heart into every stroke to keep them tidy. She doesn't scribble, preferring to finish her work before playing or resting.

She is still young and has never been exposed to writing before, so her beginner strokes are stiff, and she cannot control the size of her letters. This is to be expected. Once she grows up, gains better control over her wrists and strength, and gets used to writing, these problems will vanish. Killer Croc is well aware of this and is not in any rush.

Copying is a time-consuming task. Whenever Megan’s pen slips, she crosses out the word and rewrites it in the space deliberately left below.

It takes about half an hour to finish. Since he watches her write, there is no need to check the work. In the neatly formatted notebook, her immature handwriting looks quite cute compared to his own sharp, fluid script.

Killer Croc puts the notebook away and takes out another—Mathematics.

To Megan, math is simpler than recognizing and copying words. Her progress has long surpassed addition and subtraction; she has started calculating multiplication and division, not only grasping the concept of negative numbers but also handling fractions with ease.

In the talent-filled Arkham Asylum, this certainly doesn't count for much, but Killer Croc, who follows her learning progress, feels happy for her. Because Megan is not a stupid child; if she can recover from her illness, if she possesses that one-in-a-million luck, she will grow up just like other children, continue her studies, and eventually begin a career of her own.

This is Killer Croc’s most sincere hope and wish for an innocent child.

The math homework is completed even faster. By the time they finish, the evening has arrived. They go to the cafeteria for dinner together, and then Megan returns to the Joker’s cell. He is already complaining!

Seeing Megan enter, the Joker curls his lip and says, "Ha! What did I say? I knew it, you little mouse—you’re the one who took my pen." Perhaps adults and children share the same curse: the pens they use are always in short supply. Even if there are many at the beginning, in the end, not a single one remains, or the ones that do—

Are either running out of ink, have broken tips, don't write smoothly, or are the ones they like the least.

A grim, terrifying smile hangs on his pale face, but it does not frighten Megan at all. She looks up at the Joker, slowly hands him the pen she had tucked in her pocket, and shows no guilt or fear.

This makes the Joker’s expression darken. His slightly narrowed eyes flash with a strange meaning as he stares at her for a long time. In the end, he does not take the pen but reaches out to pinch her chin. He isn't actually that angry, nor would he be too petty with his "fun." The atmosphere softens, he looks at Megan’s cheeks from side to side, and a smile appears once more.

"Well, you’ve become braver. Actually, that’s just what I wanted!"